AGAHUGU KAJYA GUCIKA KARABANZA GUTA UMUCO. INKWANO YABA ARI CYO KIBAZO CYANGWA IMITEKEREREZE Y’UBU IVANGWA N’UMUCO BIDAHURA NIYO MBOGAMIZI?

Maître Valentin Akayezu

Uwagerageza gusesengura kandi akanashingira uko umuco wahoze ubyerekana, Inkwano yagize uruhare rutajegajega mu kubaka no gukomeza imiryango hashingiwe ku muco gakondo w’u Rwanda.

Iyo usomye Itegeko rigenga abantu n’umuryango mu Rwanda usanga rigena inshingano abashyingiranywe bafite zirimo: gufashanya, gutabarana, ubudahemuka no kugira uruhare mu gutunga umuryango. Iryo tegeko rivuga neza ryeruye, ko abashyingiranywe biyemeza “gushinga umuryango ndemyabuzima”. Ntirinagarukira aho kuko riha abashyingiranywe, inshingano yo gufasha abo bakomomokaho igihe babikeneye (Assistance aux parents en situation de fragilité).

Burya ntihazagire uwibeshya, gushyira mu bikorwa Itegeko ritajyana mu njyana imwe n’ibyo umuco uteganya biragorana kuko habaho icyo nakwita “résistance sociale” kuko riba ridahura n’imyemerere ya benshi mu bagize umuryango w’Abantu. Ndatanga urugero. Itegeko rigenga umuryango n’abantu ryo mu 1988 ryavugaga ko nta mugore wemerewe gukora ubucuruzi, atabiherewe uruhushya n’umugabo we. Kuko mu myumvire ya benshi, byagaragaraga ko umugabo afite ubutware bwo kutavugirwamo, ntibabibonagamo imbogamizi. Bizwi ko abagabo benshi bajyaga bafata icyemezo cyo kuvana abagore babo ku kazi, bakicara imuhira ngo barere abana.

Aho amahame y’uburinganire bw’ibitsina atereye intambwe igaragara, imyumvire isa nk’iyahindutse, ndetse n’umuco usa nk’ugerageje korohera umugore ngo agire uruhare mu iterambere ry’imibereho nk’uko bimeze ku mugabo. Aho haziye itegeko rishya rigenga umuryango n’abantu ryo mu 2016, mu ngingo zaryo hakuwemo ibyahoze mu itegeko ryo mu 1988 bivuga ko umugabo ariwe mutware w’urugo (chef de la famille) maze itegeko rishya rishimangira ko umugabo n’umugore bafatanya mu miyoberere y’urugo (co-gestion de la famille). Ariko umuntu ashobora guhera aho ngaho yibaza niba ubwo bureshyeshye bw’umugabo n’umugore koko butanga ibisubizo mu kubaka ituze ry’imiryango?

Nta bushakashatsi bwite nakoze kuri icyo kibazo, ariko mfatiye ku bigaragazwa n’ibyegeranyo by’inzego z’ubucamanza mu Rwanda, dusanga ko isenyuka ry’ingo rifatiye ku butane (divorce) rigenda rirushaho kuzamuka cyane, ibyaha bikorerwa mu miryango bikaba bigenda bisatira ikigero cyo hejuru. Kandi ufatiye ku nzego z’imibereho, umuntu ntiyabura kuvuga ko ahanini, usanga ubutane bugaragara cyane cyane mu kiciro cy’abafite uko bahagaze neza mu by’ubukungu kuko usanga umugore ahanini adafite impungenge z’uko azabaho igihe atandukanye n’umugabo we. Ibyaha bikorerwa mu ngo uzasanga ahanini bigaragara mu miryango ikennye. Ibyo bikaba byashingirwaho, hemezwa ko bwa bureshyeshye bw’umugabo n’umugore mu miyoborere y’urugo bugifite imbogamizi kuko sosiyete nyarwanda yo ahanini irakibona mu ihame ry’ubutavogerwa bw’umugabo. Urebye cyera, ingo zageragezaga kubaho zikaramba, atari uko nta bibazo byabagaho, ahubwo kuko umuco wahatiraga abantu kugendera mu myumvire ya “niko zubakwa’ cyane cyane bigahengekerwa ku mugore (soumission de la femme pour la survie de son foyer).

Ibi rero byo gushyiraho amategeko hatabanjwe gushaka uburyo bwo gutegura umuco (adaptation préalable de la mentalité culturelle) nibyo bituma habaho igongana hagati y’amategeko n’umuco bityo ubukana bw’ikibazo cyashakwaga gukemurwa bukarushaho kwiyongera. Mfatiye aha, ndagaruka ku kibazo cy’inkwano. Ese ikwiye kuvaho cyangwa kubungwabungwa?

Inkwano

Hejuru navuze kubirebana n’inshingano z’abashyingiranywe harimo ko biyemeza gushinga umuryango ndemyabuzima yewe no gufasha abo bakomokaho igihe bikenewe. Ikibazo gikomeye cyibazwa ni ukumenya niba ibyo itegeko risaba, bishoboka mu gihe umuco utabigizemo uruhare. Ku bwanjye, uruhare rw’inkwano mu gutuma ibyo bisabwa mu itegeko bishoboka ni ingenzi.

Inkwano ni iki rero?

Nkuko bikunze gusobanurwa, inkwano ni ikimenyetso cy’ishimwe, umuryango w’umuhungu uha uw’umukobwa kuko “wareze neza”. Aha rero, byumvikane ko “Uburere” bw’umukobwa niryo zingiro mu guha igisobanuro gikwiye impamvu y’itangwa ry’inkwano. Sinibuka neza niba mu itegeko ryo mu 2016 navuzeho, umuhango w’isaba (fiançailles) ugarukwaho mu bigomba kubanziriza ishyingirwa nkuko byari bimeze mu itegeko ryo mu 1988. Ariko kubwanjye, numvako, Inkwano iza ari igisubizo ku burere bwishimirwa bw’umukobwa haba mu by’umuco, kuby’imyemerere nyobokamana (twitaye ko umuryango nyarwanda wemera cyane Imana) ndetse no ku bumenyi mvashuri. Ibyo uko ari bitatu biruzuzanya mu kumvikanisha neza icyo “uburere bw’umukobwa” bugomba gushingirwaho ishimwe ry’inkwano, bisobanuye. Twibuke ko umukobwa ariwe urebwa cyane, kuko n’ubwo sosiyete nyarwanda isa n’iyaguriye amarembo yayo amahame y’uburinganire bw’ibitsina, ariko iracyabogamira cyane ku bagabo (société patriarichale).

Aha rero, hahita haza Ikindi kibazo, ese umuco ni iki? Turawupimira ku bya kera ko isi ihinduka. Iki ni ikibazo kigora gusubiza, kuko usanga ubona hari abitsitsa ko hagomba kubaho ubworoherane (tolerance culturelle). Ariko njye mbibonera mu buryo, benshi bitwara ku kibazo kireba umuco. Nubwo nyamucye (minorité) bifuza kugenda mu buryo bundi butandukanye nuko benshi babyifuza, n’ubwo bakubahirwa amahitamo yabo, ariko ntacyo byonona ku muco mu gihe benshi bagaragaza ko bifuza kwiberaho mu buryo basanganywe. Aha rero niho umuco w’inkwano ugomba kurindirwa, kuko sosiyete nyarwanda ikomeje kugaragaza ko iwukeneye.

Ibyangiriza umuco w’inkwano twavuga ibikurikira:

–guhindurwa ikiguzi aho kuba ishimwe: Ababyeyi bakwiye kwibutswa ko kurera abakobwa babo ari inshingano, atari igishoro cy’imari bagomba kuzagaruza;

–Inkwano ni ikimenyetso cyo guhuza imiryango: iyo ihinduwe ikiguzi, nino guhemukira imiryango y’abana kuko uruhande rumwe ruzitwara nk’urwaguze, urugo rwubakire ku bimeze nk’amasezerano y’umuguzi n’umugurisha. Urebye muri iki gihe unasanga n’imibanire y’imiryango yashyingiranye ikendera. Ubundi aho wabaga warajishe igisabo warahubahaga cyane.

Impamvu zituma Inkwano itakaza agaciro kayo zaba nyinshi cyane, ntawazirondora ngo aziranginze. Ahubwo se hakwiye gukorera iki?

Hari ibyo navuze itegeko riteganya nk’inshingano z’abashyingiranywe. Ariko hatabaye kwirengagiza, izo nshingano ntizishoboka hatabaye guha umuco agaciro kawo mu misigasire y’imibanire y’abashyingiranywe.

Muri urwo rwego, mbona ko inkwano ikwiye kuba igikorwa cy’ubushake nk’uko hari n’ibindi itegeko ryemera ko ari ibikorwa by’ubushake, urugero itangwa ry’umunani.

Aho tugeze, imfatiro z’umuco kubireba ishyingirana zarajegajeze ku buryo mu mishakanire y’abasore n’inkumi, rya zingiro ry’uburere, risa nirikendera. Bityo, ntabwo abantu bakwiye kwiziraka ku nkwano mu gihe icyo ibereyeho (uburere bw’abashyingiranywa) kitakigaragara ko ari umwihariko bitwararitse.

Amategeko y’u Rwanda akwiye kwemera ko habaho kubana hagati y’umuhungu n’umukobwa bitagombereye ishyingirana (union de fait) nk’uko bibaho no mu bindi bihugu, ibyo benshi bakunze kwita kubana kuri contrat. Ibi bizakemura ikibazo kinubirwa na benshi cy’ikiguzi cy’inkwano, kandi gikemure ikibazo cy’imibanire y’umuhungu n’umukobwa kenshi bakunze kuvangirwa na bene wabo mu mibanire yabo bababwira ko hari inshingano babafiteho.

Bityo, inkwano izasigara ari Igikorwa cy’ubushake hagati y’imiryango ibyemeranywaho mu buryo bwubahisha umuco kandi abashyingiranywe koko biciye mu ishyingirana ryemewe n’itegeko bagashora gushinga umuryango ndemyabuzima no kubaha inshingano zose z’abashyingiranywe.